I am just completely baffled. 5 months of spending +66% of my time in a hospital room, and today we are discharged. I have to say it is a great feeling. If I had ever spent time in jail (as a prisoner), I am sure being released would feel something like this.
I have really given up on a lot of things over the past couple of months. Exercise, writing, reading, all kind of left to their own. It is so strange to have so much seemingly free time, and not be able to accomplish anything. The stress of living out of a hospital and trying to raise a 6, now 7, month old has really been overwhelming. I sometimes think sleep is one of those magical things that the rich get to enjoy. I am sure this feeling I have had lately is something akin to being a zombie, aimlessly searching for brains... or at this point just any brain would do.
Now we are down to spending two days a week in the hospital, and only for very short periods. I guess this means I will have to consider finding a use for myself again. It is an intimidating thought, looking for work again. I had already found a really good job once, but had to give it up when Eoin got sick. Now I am not sure what I will do. Most likely I will just have to settle for the first thing that pays anywhere what I need to live. Which is sad, because that most likely results in working a slave job. However at this point I really don't care anymore.
Of course I have always considered returning to school. Maybe finishing a degree in science. However, that is also very unlikely, I still have two unpaid student loans, as well as two little guys to take care of now. Not to mention, I am probably severely lacking the brain power to complete any difficult courses. Meh, I guess back to work it is. The military is always looking for civilians to fix their broken kit, maybe General Dynamics will give me a job.
